My body cracks me up.
True to form, my cycle this month has been picture-perfect. My reproductive system is a full-on Monet. Sure it looks good from far away, but up close its a big mess. (Thank you Clueless).
In a move that brought on the creepy deja-vu heebie-jeebies, I restarted my fertilityfriend account and dug out my thermometer. My accupuncturist has decided she wants to see some charting, so she can more finely tune the Chinese herbs she is prescribing me.
Have I mentioned that these Chinese herbs taste like the ass of a tree. Well they do, so I'm not too excited about having a variety of tree ass to test my gag reflexes with twice a day. But, I'll do it. Just mark it down as one more thing we infertiles have to go through to achieve the same goal that Candy Crackwhore manages to achieve when accidently tripping in a semen-filled alley.
But I digress. My temps looked great. I had a dip yesterday, and also noted some great egg white goings-ons...and my temp shot up today. My Ovu-cue also detected ovulation as well. Day 15. Pretty perfect. Not that it matters of course.
It depresses me that I've never been pregnant, even once, even a little, even for a week. I am still left wondering, if my body is doing what it is suppose to do...what is wrong with me?
If I have terrible egg quality...Why? Has any RE in the history of RE-dum ever answered this question?
Sometimes I think my RE wants me to admit I lied on my paperwork and I'm actually older than I am, that way he could just blame it on my age and be done with it. But its hard to tell a 28 year old that her eggs suck because of her age. I'm afraid it's not going to be so hard to tell a 31 year old that...as my birthday is a short 3 months away :(
Oh well, I'm really not as bitter or depressed as this verbal diarrhea post may have you believe. I am excited for Christmas. I have some great presents to hand out this year and I am looking forward to spending some time with my wonderful family and being thankful for all the blessings I have in my life.
With that, I will leave you with this funny cartoon from Mompetition. I ran across her videos yesterday, and they crack me up. Enjoy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VY5ZDMLpXUU&feature=player_embedded
I was nodding my head through this whole post. I am having the same feelings!
ReplyDeleteMy cycles have been perfect since taking metformin for the PCOS...everything happening when it's supposed to and looking like it's supposed to look.
But every month...nothing. No pregnancies - zero.
And I am at a heathly age! So what is up?!
I am with you sister. It's the most frustrating thing in the world.
http://missconception-ads.blogspot.com/
haha, how familiar! No one knows how intricate conception is until they go through 1/2 of what we have been through! One day, one day it will be our turn, until then, keep your strength and let me know if you need anything!
ReplyDeleteHa! Love the Candy Crackwhore bit. Alas, so true.
ReplyDeleteMy body also appeared to be doing things perfectly when I started TTC again, gosh, years ago. And then when we headed to the RE after months of failure, I had cycle after cycle of failure. Each time I started a new cycle the nurse would cheerily say "Well, your last cycle looked great!" Looks aren't everything! It was hard not to glare at her and say, "If it was so great, I wouldn't be back here AGAIN!"
Here's hoping your cycle will not only look great, but also BE great!
This post made me a smile in an "Oh my God, I can totally relate" kind of way. Without any definitive reasons why you can't get pregnant (or stay pregnant) the frustrations just keep mounting.
ReplyDeleteLet's hope that this perfect cycle of yours continues to a perfect ending!
Oh the herbs!! I've been choking mine down a few times a day too, and they are definitely rough!
ReplyDeleteHm, I'm wondering what the ass of a tree tastes like...or how you know. Have you tasted the ass of a tree before? Is there something we don't know about you?
ReplyDeleteI kid I kid.
And I totally understand. I've never even been a little pregnant, not one, not ever.